The Elder Fruit
I woke up and got stuffed in a bag. I almost suffocated. It was half closed. There was a frui- I mean an elder right next to me. He was very old and wise I look up at him and said, “ Who are you?”. He paused for a second but looked back at me. He was surprised yet confused. “Hello little cherry?” He said. “ H-Hi,” I mumbled.
“ Well, child, is it okay if I told you a story?,” He said unsurely. I nodded slowly. “One time the orange one spoke that—”
“ Is this gonna be boring?” I questioned. He frowned.
Hello Allyson,
I so enjoyed this story because it took the perspective of the fruit. There’s great balance of dialogue, descriptive vocabulary (suffocated, stuffed), and humor at the end.
I am nominating your entry for the 100WC Showcase!
Keeping being creative & writing!
Francine (Team 100)
Twin Cities, Minnesota USA
Allyson, I’m enchanted with your interpretation of the prompt and the excellent dialogue you have used. I also really like the inferred hesitancy you show when you ‘nodded slowly,’ then you openly, (cheekily or bravely I wonder,) ask if it was going to be boring. I’m an ‘elder’ too and I see in my grandies eyes the same question forming when I start telling a story!
Thanks for sharing,
Jackie (Team 100WC)
New Zealand